Frumpzilla

Toronto Raptors Mascot Eats Cheerleader

As if having to watch their team play the Nets wasn’t punishment enough, fans that actually stuck around for Toronto’s February 3rd half-time show were treated to another horrific display: The Raptors’ mascot devouring (and escaping to an undisclosed location with) one of the team’s cheerleaders.

Disgraceful, indeed, but if you’re like me, you have an uncanny level of fascination, and thus allow for a rather large margin of error, with all things mascot.  As a hypothetical: The San Diego Chicken, as opposed to, say, Tony Gwynn, drowning Bernese Mountain Dog puppies makes the act slightly less morally reprehensible, doesn’t it? Crazy, but true.

With that in mind, until further evidence comes to light, I’m assuming that the cheerleader simply had it coming.

Thanks to DBJ for the tip.

NBA Jam is Back!!

EA sports announced earlier this month that it would be resurrecting the the ‘NBA Jam’ franchise and that it would be released exclusively for Nintendo’s Wii.  In other news, I will be buying a Wii in the not-so-distant future.  Yesterday, images leaked of the Wii version out in the wild.

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How to piss off David Stern

GUESS THEY’RE STILL BULLETS AT HEART (line stolen from NY Post)

“I’m not your punk!” Crittenton shouted…a verbal insult so offensive to teammate Gilbert Arenas, it prompted the completely appropriate response of pulling a gun in the locker room of the Verizon Center Christmas Eve.  

More after the Frump….

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King James’ Shame: The Secret, Nike Confiscated, Video of Lebron James Getting Dunked On?

If you’re a sports fan, and haven’t been living under a rock the past few weeks, you’ve probably heard about King James’ Shame; aka the video of Lebron James getting dunked on by Xavier’s Jordan Crawford at Bron-Bron’s Nike sponsored basketball camp (Nike officials reportedly confiscated the video, allegedly at Lebron’s request). I’ll spare you any further drivel, just check out this clip from TMZ that appears to be shot on someone’s cell phone.  There’s a link to an even better video (found over at ebaumnation) after the jump as well…

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Possibly the Greatest Music Video For Any Original Network Television Feature’s Score, Ever…

But please don’t take that assessment the wrong way, Frumpsters.  With those qualifiers, such a video could still be, generally speaking, pretty damn shitty, and that’s basically what we have after the jump. 

So yeah, a trusted source just informed me that North Carolina State alumnus John Tesh is responsible for that envigorating, nearly unforgettable jam/theme song for the “NBA on NBC”.  Yes, Wolfpackers, I’m afraid it’s true, and on both counts. Now, if an acquaintance, or even a complete stranger, had told me that over a pint or ten down at the local watering hole, I’d of called them a bald-faced liar and asked them to kindly leave.  Otherwise, fistifcuffs would almost certainly ensue, and understandably so. I mean, I just don’t take the alleged association of things like competitive sports and John Tesh lightly, and I’ve always felt such sentiment was perfectly reasonable…UNTIL NOW

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Josh Childress’s Great Escape

Go Josh. Americans can be out-sourced too. 

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“Kobe, Tell Me How My Ass Tastes”

By this point, I’m sure most of you have seen the video of Shaq’s freestyle about, mostly, Kobe.  Kazaam!  Come on, Shaq.  You freaking hate the guy.

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Enjoying the “Playoffs”?

You better be.  I know I am, and there’s really no excuse for any sports fan not to be.  Between the NBA Finals, College World Series, Euro 2008, and today’s U.S. Open showdown between a couple guys named Tiger and Rocco, what more could one really ask for this time of year?  So yeah, today would have probably been a nice day to call in sick.  We’ve got Rocco and Tiger at noon ET, Miami and Florida State, the 1st and 3rd favorites respectively to win the CWS, in an elimination game at 2:00, and Germany and Austria for a spot in the Euro Quarter Finals at 2:45.  Time your lunch appropriately.  If you had the foresight to Tivo this stuff, good luck avoiding the scores/updates today at work.  If you had no such vision, well, be mindful of the visionaries around you.  At least we should all get to enjoy seeing two potential CWS cinderellas square off in Georgia vs Stanford tonight at 7:00.  College Football should be taking notes…

Lakers vs Celtics NBA Finals Time Capsule

I figured since we’re in the heat of a classic Lakers-Celtics rivalry in the NBA Finals, we might as well take a stroll down memory lane to 1987, the last time these two storied franchises squared off for the title.  Make the jump for some bits of general knowledge that may just make the difference at your next trivia night.  A $50 bar tab won is much sweeter than one earned, there’s no denying that, so it’s probably worth your time.  Even if it isn’t, if nothing else these nuggets might just bring back some nice memories, or at least make you appreciate the way things change.  And stay the same…

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Lakers Set to Win 4th NBA Title Under Leadership of Phil Jackson; Boston is a Stupid Town

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The Purity of Showtime: A.C. Green Revisited.

With the Lakers destined to win yet another title, we revisit the glory days of the Showtime team with a look back at none other than the seminal team virgin, A.C. Green.

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What Will Kobe Bryant Jump Over Next?  A Kiddie Pool Of Snakes While Paling Around With A Midget?

Oh wait, he just did that. Kobe takes the whole “Mamba” motif a bit too far here if you ask me, and I don’t really understand the purpose behind teaming up with Jackass, but hey, it’s Kobe.  What’s next on Kobe’s “To Jump” list, homeless people?  Since that’s been done, I guess the odds are slim to none, though, with a 3-0 lead over the Spurs, Kobe could probably get away with just about anything.  You never know…

GMC Releases a Classic

Never let up!

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You stay classy, Sir Charles

Ernie Johnson pulled a “Papa Burgundy” the other night on our boy Charles Barkely.  The former Right Guard spokesperson and self proclaimed “Round Mound of Rebound” takes it in stride of course.  Probably because he knew he’s had it coming, not to mention the whole “It’s funny ’cause it’s true!” effect.  The recent revelation that, by the grace of God Hammer of Thor, an Anchorman 2 may be in the works makes this all the more appropriate. 

Clip comes to you coutesy of Odenized.  Don’t mind the setup, the punchline is worth waiting for.  Enjoy…

The NBA Showdown

This is the greatest first round of all-time. History in the making!

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