Tag Archives: ESPN

This just in, courtesy of ESPN: If Harrison Barnes were better, he’d be better

January 13, 2011


ESPN wants you to know that if Harrison Barnes were better, he'd be better

I’m not gonna name names, or incidents, but let’s just say I know a small handful of folks that may or may not think The Worldwide Leader’s love for University of North Carolina athletics is a tad fervent at times.

Now, to be fair, no one could accuse ESPN of being the only media outlet that was high on UNC freshman “sensation” Harrison Barnes coming out of high school. No qualms there.

The problem is, halfway through the season, Barnes has yet to be anything but sensationally mediocre, at least relative to expectations.

Still, as the above graphic from ESPN’s 2nd half coverage of the Tar Heels’ 64-61 win over Virginia Tech highlights , it’s clearly very important to remember one thing: If Harrison Barnes were just a little bit better — like, even just one shot a game better — well, he’d be fairly solid. And don’t you forget it.

Barnes — the nation’s first freshman to make a Preseason All-American team — was 5/11 from the floor, good for 12 points against the Hokies, by the way. That’s  6/12 for either 14 or 15 points, if you want to consider what might have been.

Heh, and I bet  you thought preseason polls were the greatest threat to the integrity of college athletics…

Thanks to The Admiral for the photo…

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Jay Crawford’s love for Snoop Dog, Dr. Dre gets no love from the ESPN First Take crew…

December 8, 2010


Jay Crawford Hearts Snoop Dog, Dr. Dre, Too Short

There’s been a lot of discussion on ESPN today about the 30th anniversary of John Lennon’s death.  Quite a bit more than I was expecting, honestly, but I guess Howard Cosell’s legendary announcement on Monday Night Football helps tie Lennon’s tragedy to the world of sports, if nothing else.

Well, right or wrong, Jay Crawford suffered a slightly different kind of tragedy on ESPN’s First Take this morning. The Lennon-inspired topic was “Who’s your No. 1 Musical Icon?,” and Jay’s answer didn’t go over too well (video after the jump)…


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Auburn Fans Don’t Like ESPN, Mark Schlabach

November 8, 2010


Mark Schlabach gets called out by Auburn fansWhether it’s due to being an alumnus of a bitter rival (The University of Georgia), or because he’s allegedly just another pawn in the game of the Worldwide Leader’s apparently evil, agenda driven sports coverage, it’s clear that fans on The Plains aren’t terribly taken by Mark Schlabach.

Maybe it’s because Mark had the audacity to write something so obviously biased against poor ole Cam Newton. I don’t know, but the chants of “You suck!,” “Tell the truth!,” and “You’re terrible!” have never better exemplified the class and nobility of Auburn Tiger/War Eagle/Flying War Tiger fans.

I mean, YouTube user stagman1’s description of this video really nails it, yeah?:

“Journalist,” Mark Schlabach receives less than warm welcome from Auburn fans shortly after feeding misinformation to the media in a well-timed smear campaign against Auburn’s Heisman front-runner, Cam Newton.

Oh, by the way, in case you didn’t notice, the #sarcasm tag is tautly attached to this post…

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ESPN isn’t the only media player jacked up about 3D television technology

January 11, 2010


With the Worldwide Leader’s recent announcement of the launch of 3D television broadcasts, beginning with this summer’s World Cup, sports fans the world over were quite aroused at the prospect of donning gaudy eye-wear and duping their visual faculties into adding an extra dimension to traditional television content.

Well, not to be outdone, it appears another market player will be taking its own bite out of the inevitable 3D-TV craze on the horizon, and it’s all thanks to a man appropriately named Johnson.  Lance Johnson, that is.

That’s right, Frumpsters: Porn. 3D porn, and it’s coming right at you, in your face, from the comfort of your own living room (for only about $4,000 up front, and then about twenty to thrity bones per month thereafter).  Frump it here for more on this story…

Lance Johnson: Bringing you 3D porn since 2010 (Photo Credit: Asher Moses)


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Valdosta, Georgia: TitleTown USA

July 31, 2008


Valdosta, Georgia wins Title Town, USA competition

Congratulations, Valdosta.  Winning this ESPN contest is quite an honor, I suppose.  For those of you that don’t know, around 50% of my family is from Valdosta, and still down there.  I’ve spent a lot of time ’round dem parts, and still make it down around two times a year.  Despite that, and my knowledge of the area’s remarkable sports history, I was still rather surprised when I heard they’d beat out places like Boston, Chicago, New York, Los Angeles, Chapel Hill, Green Bay, and so on to win this whole TitleTown thing.  I figure that means that the detached, purely objective observer, as you likely are, is extremely surprised.  Well, assuming that’s the case, I felt it would be a pretty good time to drop a little Valdosta/Lowndes County knowledge on ya…


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