So, The GingerHead Man contacted me today from Kuala Lumpur (he’s still on vacay). Apparently, during his semi-daily perusal of Deadspin, he’d come across this fantastic video of “Norm the Umpire” breaking dozens of kids’ spirits — as any truly accomplished, melodramatic umpire should — on a weekly basis.
Well, this naturally gave rise to yet another discussion about my and The GingerHead Man’s lifelong ambition of one day becoming volunteer Little League umpires, and doing the exact same thing. Only better. That’s right, better.
Don’t get us wrong, Norm is pretty dang good, but he ain’t the best. We open our case with what I like to call “The Macarena Master.” Make the jump for several more…
Can you believe it, Frumpsters? What’s almost certainly Frumpzilla’s favorite secular holiday is here again, and, as we’ve done in the past, we’re here to give you some tips to help ensure your “administrative professionals” feel as special as reasonably possible.
Sure, it may be the same advice we gave you last year, and the year before that, but that’s only because it’s damn good. Seriously, literally dozens of readers may or may not have paid heed to what follows and in turn made their respective Secretary’s Day experiences truly extraordinary.
Frump’s Note: Now, before anyone else gives us any grief; For our sake, for your sake, for your “administrative professionals'” sake, please make sure you’ve got your Facetiousness Detector in the “On” position prior to reading. Think “script from a Secretary’s Day 1952 public service announcement/film,” or something. Thanks.