All About the Benjamins, What!

Mon, Mar 3, 2008 at 1:10 pm ET


Frumped by

“Big Ben” Roethlisberger just got paid.

Ben has an eight year extension for $102 Million. Ben wanted his paper up front, so more than $36 million is guaranteed. Hopefully, Ben gets that in Euros because inflation is a #@!$# right now.He intends to donate $20 Million to former Steeler Terry Bradshaw. 

Bradshaw emotionally distressed millions of movie goers with his Full Monty in Failure to Launch. One man whose name is Undisclosed (yes, his name is really Undisclosed) said, “He scratched my cornea with those man cheeks.” Tragically, he is a professional Pong machine calibrator. He seeks $5 Million in damages and an injunction to prevent any future airings of the film. 

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