Frumpzilla

And the 2009 tennis season is officially underway with the Australian Open, liiiiiiiiiiive from Mel-bun (Cliff Drysdale voice). 

We’re actually in the Round of 16 already, but I’ll make my predictions anyway.  After the jump.

Doods:

First of all, I’m pretty sure all tennis enthusiasts would call one of the slams (depending on geographic location) the greatest tennis event of the year.  Not Donk Spotter.  My favorite tennis moment of the year is watching that bigot from down-unda, Lleyton Hewitt, lose in the Aussie Open.  It’s exhilirating.  And guess what?  It happens every year now because he stinks.  He stinks like that bat bait Mick concocted in Crocodile Dundee II.  Moving along…

I don’t know if this has anything to do with the recent inauguration and the fact that Donk Spotter watched the coverage for 24 straight hours, but I’m taking Rocket Roddick.  Yea, it’s got everything to do with it because RR’s played like crap for about two straight years.  Nevertheless, after this past week, I have to pick a Yank; I just have to.  Plus, I just can’t “Pick” this guy.  No way.  James Blake, you say?  Naaaah, I’ll go with the big serve on the hard court.

Llllllladies (Well, some of them):

Since Aphrodite, pictured above, is already out, I’ll go with AJ Hawk.  I mean Dinara Safina.  Terrifying.