Things God may or may not have written on his or her hand…

Tue, Mar 9, 2010 at 6:03 pm ET

Kissed With Apocalypse, The Rest

Frumped by

Hey, as a disclaimer, we here at Frumpzilla don’t claim to know a whole buttload of crap about the Gospels, or God, or whatever, and if we do have an area of expertise (debatable), it’s certainly not theology.  That said, when faced with frumping about topics we happen to be particularly ignorant about, we feel it’s wiser to turn to an authority; someone intimately associated with the subject. In this case, Sarah Palin.

As I’m sure most of you know by now, Sarah Palin likes to write little reminders on her hand(s). She even references them during speeches and stuff. Sarah’s tried to make light of this, of course, and, to be fair, I’ve really never felt it was that big of a deal…until now.

A few days ago, Palin, apparently still a little self conscious about her hand notes, attempted to further rationalize the practice by citing the Book of Isaiah, Chapter 49, verse 16 which reads (in pertinent part):

Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands

Long story short, the Bible says God wrote on “his”  hand to help “him” remember things, which Sarah Palin has confirmed for us, and therefore Palin and her manual reminders are in good company.

Needless to say, I’m satisfied.  But what else might God, in his or her* infinite wisdom, have needed a handy little note to remind him or her to do?  Just about the entire Frumpzilla staff offers some suggestions for you (in no particular order) after the jump.  We’d love to hear some from you as well…

As another disclaimer, we’re going with the Fundamentalist, Judeo-Christian God here.  Palin’s God.  And yes;  believe it or else, God writes exclusively in red ink (boldly when he wants to link you to something else).

  • Jesus, Hockey practice.  6:00

Jesus loves to play hockey

  • Clay Aiken: Send one more female fantasy as a last ditch effort (For the lulz if nothing else)

Clay Aiken is gay

Moses parting the Red Sea

  • Nobody puts baby in a ‘coroner’…except me! Haha (just kidding, Swayze (but not really))

Patrick Swayze Dirty Dancing

  • Red Sox…probably been long enough.  Cubs, ehhh…
  • Heads, ‘Global Warming.’  Tails, Ice Age
  • Remind LRH just how bad he F’d up

  • Slipping a bit.  Make some statues cry, or something
  • For the Lulz: Show Peter that damn farting preacher

  • Text ‘Vote’ to 5702 to vote for Carrie Underwood

  • Today is monday…6 sunsets, then sunday/sleep
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3 Responses to “Things God may or may not have written on his or her hand…”

  1. Anonymous Says:

  2. Carroll Hightower Says:

    RT @YieldToFrump: In honor of Sarah Palin, things God may or may not have written on his/her hand:


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