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Quick Draft Thoughts: Part 1

April 29, 2011

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No fancy intro here.  Four observations from your humble and unreliable correspondent.

Lets get to it…

1.  Finally something to watch on Thanksgiving

Best pick of the night belonged to the Detroit Lions.  Hands down.   My favorite pick.  The most entertaining thing to watch in all of football is a dominating defensive tackle (see Suh’s performance against Texas in the 2010 Big XII title game and Fairley in this year’s National Title).  The goat of previous drafts, the Lions have hit 3 home runs in recent years with Calvin Johnson, Ndamukong Suh and now Nick Fairley….with a foruth pick that could make it a grand slam should Ciaran man-crush and ceiling poster boy Matty Stafford ever prove not to be made out of beautiful fine crystal.  That aside…

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The Best Fails of 2010

January 5, 2011

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The Dating Site “Establishedmen.com” Rules the World in Subtlety

June 2, 2010

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Stay classy Miami Living magazine.

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Freaky Sexy World Records

May 19, 2010

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Jonah Falcon, proud record holder

Another gem found on the WolfWeb is this blog “the frisky” listing the 13 Freakishly Sexy World Records

Records include “worlds strongest vagina”, “worlds biggest orgy” and most orgasms in one sitting

Frump it for some tasty tidbits to amaze your friends and try to beat yourself!

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Apex High alum Landon Powell catches 19th perfect game in MLB history

May 10, 2010

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Article on the game and Landon’s bond with pitcher Dallas Braden

Pitchers get too much credit for the no-hitters and perfect games…everyone knows that the REAL credit should go to the catcher.  Throwing a ball?  Please.  Anyone can do that.  Hell, they usually drag some celebrity stiff on the field before the game and let them do it a few times.  You notice they never have someone “catch” the first pitch that is not a professional.

Kidding aside, just a quick Frump shout out to my former Cougar teammate.  Pretty awesome.  Here is a quick link to Landon’s Wikipedia page and MLB stat page.

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Lord Jesus Christ is hit by a car while leading the NFL in jersey sales

May 7, 2010

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MIRACULOUS.

A man, Lord Jesus Christ, aka Lord Jesus Christ, suffered minor injuries while walking down a Northampton street on Tuesday….cheating death as 200o pounds of of hurtling steel and flammable liquids hurtled towards Christ as he crossed on a crosswalk.

At the same time, Lord Jesus Christ, aka Timothy Tebow, leads the NFL in jersey sales only a few short weeks into his NFL career.  Tebow’s brand bested such tried All-Pro, NFL warriors like Donovan McNabb, Drew Brees, Peyton Manning and Brett Farve as a third-string situational, developmental QB.

In we trust.  Hallelujah!!

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The Miracle of Evolution?

May 3, 2010

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According to The Sun, British boobs are growing at a rapid pace.  You know it is getting bad when the former “big dog”, a bra called “The Windsock” (a K cup size), is no longer big enough for the largest Brit busts.  To counter the problem, the Bravissimo Chain and Debenhams (a department store I guess) has introduced the KK Cup for the suffering, squashed and stuffed ladies of the UK.

For a little perspective on how big the KK bra is, EACH cup is 10 inches wide…the diameter of most dinner plates.

Experts evidently blame pollution and hormones (The Chese blames McDonalds, but that is perhaps for another post) and believe that it wont be long until a LL will be necessary.

Cheerio!

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LA Lakers Lead the League in Obnoxious Gold Chain Sales – Exclusive Interview with Lakers Guy

April 28, 2010

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With a lot of help from Lakers Guy, the LA Lakers once again have led the NBA in merchandise sales.

According to ESPN,the bandwagon has been crowded and growing for some time.   ‘Showtime’ has held the merchandise crown 7 out of the last 8 years.  For a state racked in debt and unemployment, its pretty remarkable the masses that reside there can afford $25 foam fingers, $80 jerseys and $30 hats in such quantities.  Frump was able to contact “Lakers Guy” (pictured above) for this exclusive interview.

Frump for the captivating interview with “Lakers Guy”

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Jenna Jameson is Looking Goooooood

April 28, 2010

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Fresh off her baby-daddy drama, Tito Ortiz a.k.a. “Captain Obvious”  is now claiming Jenna has a drug problem.

I have never understood the phrase, “rode hard and put up wet” until now.  Yikes.  Little girls everywhere take note…a life of porn, drugs and plastic surgery is no way to coast into menopause.

(thanks to the superficial for the pic)

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Boob pops out at Braves game, men all over look just like these guys

April 21, 2010

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Just goes to show…you always have to be on your toes.  You never know when a boob is going to show up…

Video and pics after the frump

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WAKE FANS (not that there’s anything wrong with that)

April 20, 2010

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What you are about to see is real.  It is not fabricated, photo-shopped or altered (by Frumpzilla) in any way.

It is posted on a public message board and therefore fair game.  Welcome to the land of unwanted internet fame, DieHardDeacon

Why anyone would post this on a forum devoted to sports, and to a 90% male audience is beyond me…not that there’s anything wrong with it.

This is Wake Fan at his most causal – his most vulnerable…in his essence, if you will.  Drink it in folks.

My sick WF tat is full view along with my RJ Reynolds 10 years of service watch and necklace combo.  Don’t hate.

Good thing I had these gloves on for my “workout” – you aint got nuthin’ on me Riley Skinner! You bitch!

Frump it for even more!

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These guys are why everyone hates the Lakers

April 18, 2010

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Exhibit A: He wears sunglasses indoors (and likely at night), keeps the top 4 buttons of his shirt unbuttoned, is rocking the black leather jacket in 70+ degree weather, combs his hair straight back (with product), flashes the “#1” sign and wears a huge, obnoxious LA Lakers gold rope necklace of which he prominently displays like Soulja Boi.  He “knows people,” drives a leased luxury car, dates 19-year-old aspiring actresses (because he “knows” people), talks loudly on his cell phone in elevators and has a tiny penis.  He does not attend games when the Lakers are bad.

Exhibit B: The ultimate fair-weather fan.  Is rocking a Yankee hat, headphones for his own music (as he cannot be bothered by the noises of the game) and is texting his mom.  He does not pay attention and doesnt really care about the outcome except when it comes to talking junk amongst his friends, saying “his” Lakers won.

Exhibit C : Two wannabe hard crackers flashing gang signs to the camera, then moving on to use the GO LAKERS thunderstick as a perverted prop on national TV.

Stay classey LA!

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Wolfpack Spring Practice: Spring Game Observations

April 17, 2010

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What a beautiful day and an excellent excuse to tailgate.  As opposed to years past, both sides of Carter-Finley were open and about 20-25k Pack fans showed up…both sides of the lower levels were close to being full.  Additionally, about 300 former players were on hand for the annual reunion, including Bill Cowher, Jerricho Cotchery, Torry Holt and Mario Williams.  Before I get into the on-field observations, I want to mention the efforts made by the current and former players to engage the fans.  For example, I watched Mario Williams come down into the section I was sitting in and slowly make his way across all of the sections, walking parallel to the field…obviously something he did on purpose.  He took the time to sign every autograph and take every picture he could.  As an alum and a fan, I really appreciated that.

Now, onto the game itself…Frump it for my “expert” opinions.

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