LA Lakers Lead the League in Obnoxious Gold Chain Sales – Exclusive Interview with Lakers Guy

Wed, Apr 28, 2010 at 3:40 pm ET

NBA, Social Commentary, Sports

Frumped by

With a lot of help from Lakers Guy, the LA Lakers once again have led the NBA in merchandise sales.

According to ESPN,the bandwagon has been crowded and growing for some time.   ‘Showtime’ has held the merchandise crown 7 out of the last 8 years.  For a state racked in debt and unemployment, its pretty remarkable the masses that reside there can afford $25 foam fingers, $80 jerseys and $30 hats in such quantities.  Frump was able to contact “Lakers Guy” (pictured above) for this exclusive interview.

Frump for the captivating interview with “Lakers Guy”

Frump:  So it must be so thrilling to be affiliated with an organization like the Lakers.  How do you describe your fan-hood and what cheering on the Lakers means to you?

LG: Just doin my part to help the team.  As you can see from my chain, we are number one.

Frump: Yes…I mentioned that.  Number one in merchandise sales.

LG: Yeah.  Number one.  Dont forget it.  Everything I do is number one.

Frump: Uh, ok…

Frump: Moving on, you may or may not know that Frumpzilla is based out of North Carolina and one of the prominent role players on the Lakers went to NC State – Josh Powell, whose path to the NBA has been a long and arduous one.  Can you talk about his influence on the team and his ability to step in and give valuable front court minutes?

LG: Where? Who? Arduous?

Frump:North Carolina is a state on the East Coast…

LG: (interrupting) F the East Coast.  2Pac 4 life

Frump: Arduous ar-du-ous -adj – requiring great exertion; laboriou—–oh never mind moving on

Frump: Josh Powell…you know…wears number 21…ESPN recently wrote about how much Kobe and team respects his game and hard a superfan, I would like to get your perspective on how he has helped the Lakers this season.

LG: Uh…is he the big goofy guy with the Dan Shaughnessy hair cut?

Frump: No….thats Pau Gasol.

LG: Hmmm…oh he is the guy with the weak porn stache’?

Frump: Adam Morrison

LG: Dude, you cant just make up players and expect me to know them.  I can barely remember the different broad’s names I smash here everynight.  AMIRITE??  Want a bump?

Frump:  No.

Frump:  Well I can see, despite your chain, that you basically know nothing about the Lakers, may have a drug problem and definitely are a Hep C carrier.  Its best I leave before I butt-inherit an STD from your imitation leather couch cushion.

LG:  Not sure what Hep C is, but if I have it, it must be number 1.

Frump: [facepalm]


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2 Responses to “LA Lakers Lead the League in Obnoxious Gold Chain Sales – Exclusive Interview with Lakers Guy”

  1. SuperMan Says:

    Im sure if you search every team there will be a character like that in each building. In my opinion you hate the Lakers and this is why you wrote this article to insult the team and the fans. Fact is there are people in every stadium just like that guy so dont think you’ve proved anything except for a little bt of ignorance.

  2. Cochese Says:


    I care very little about the Lakers one way or the other except when they drop gems like Laker Guy in my lap. Thanks for playing. If the dude had a “B” chain and pulled for the Celts I would have some other equally demeaning location-specific post and generalization. I suggest you lighten up.

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