5 melodramatic press conferences that give Tiger a run for his money

Fri, Feb 19, 2010 at 2:57 pm ET

College Football, Golf, NFL

Frumped by

Tiger Woods: The ThesbianDon’t let some of these pundits fool you, Frumpsters. Sure, sports naturally lends itself to drama, and the adoring public’s spotlight, for better or worse, typically doesn’t switch off when the lights of the arenas, fields and stadiums that players and coaches occupy in their respective professional lives do, but sometimes people just need to get a grip.

Seriously, we’ve got respected, established journalists out there (who shall remain nameless) shedding tears and using words like “profound” and “deep” in reference to this act Tiger just put on a bit ago.

And, before I get labeled a “hater” or something, let me just say that, before now, I was never particularly fazed by all this Tiger scandal stuff. It was entertaining more than anything, but never completely ruined Tiger’s aura, or whatever, for me.

Now, however, after it became overwhelmingly clear that the most sincere thing at Tiger’s presser was his own level of self absorption (or possibly the look on his mother’s face), he just might be doomed.

But at least he’s not the first to pull a stunt like this, right? I mean, his performance may have been the most Oscar-worthy, sure, but there is precedence, and we highlight a bit of what may have served as inspiration for Tiger here (and after the jump).

We’ve also got the full clip of Tiger’s press conference for those of you that may have missed out, so please do enjoy (regardless of how unfair it all is).

Man alive. Kevin Borseth became a hero of mine after this. After seeing his bubble Wolverettes blow a twenty point lead to Wisconsin, at home, Borseth — obviously was under the impression that other people actually care about women’s college basketball — freaked out, and apparently mistook the press conference podium for one of the refs.

He’s right, though: rebounds really have gone out of style these days, and Borseth’s homage to Gundy was certainly appropriate.

Given the setting, an otherwise obligatory “I’m a man!” statement may have rubbed some folks the wrong way, I was more than satisfied with Borseth’s imagery of female basketball players donning shoulder pads.

Speaking of Mike Gundy…

Okay, I’ll be honest: this probably tops Tiger’s performance in terms of raw emotional power and poignancy. If only the player in question, and his family, felt that way. Donovan transferred shortly thereafter…

For fans of the more obscure, we offer Coastal Carolina coach Dave Bennett (who kinda has it out for sports bloggers) discussing just how gosh darn expensive it is up in Kent, Ohio (which is why he chose to fly his football team up there on the day of the game instead of letting the players lounge around in a hotel, eating expensive buffet breakfasts).

“Good grannies alive,” indeed, Coach Bennett.

Lane Kiffin Press Conference Part 1 from R Mitchell on Vimeo.

Finally (before Tiger, of course) we give you Lane Kiffin’s introductory presser after being announced as the next head coach at Tennessee.

Within the context of what happened about a year later, Kiffin’s comments about embracing the Volunteers’ great tradition, his incredible work ethic, and singing Rocky Top after beating Florida may actually rival Tiger in terms of sheer pandering.

And, as promised, here’s Tiger. Dear, dear Tiger.

Let’s see, he covered the state of the U.S. education system; how he and his father helped over 9,000 children receive better education; domestic violence, or the lack it; dramatic pauses and stares; condemning the media, categorically; life lessons; self-actualization; brohugs; and, of course, Buddhism.

He also touched on golf, I believe, but that was clearly overshadowed by the rest of his performance.

Shocking, really. Especially considering Tiger’s entire life has revolved around a sport so entrenched in the concept that less is more.

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